she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
