May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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