Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
