Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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