ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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