Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
