Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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