my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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