CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
