After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
