just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize