Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Randomize
