Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize