He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize