Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
