He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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