Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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