Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
