I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
