i need an iv and a liver transplant
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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