Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Just cropdusted the office
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
