Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
