im having a threesome with these popsicles
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
