He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize