No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize