Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
