was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
