nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
