I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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