I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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