I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
