we have officially lost it.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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