For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
