fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize