Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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