Dual....:-)
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'm determined to sit on that face.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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