i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
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