Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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