Apparently you make a good broom.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Its about making memories worth repressing
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
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