Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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