her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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