Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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