We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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