was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize