think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
