Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
