where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
