I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
