He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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