ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
