Your mouth is God's brothel.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
